Story about Vlad - The Believer.

This is from my own diary.

One day goat farmer Vlad (in picture) sit on his bench, near house. Moonlight shines on him, in that way uncovering his depraved face. He is half naked, as always. I know, I watch him closely every night. He scratch his balls. Sickly-sweet smell breath in my face from wind. This is not good. He again pretends to read book, a bible. He wishes to be a believing man. But he doesn't know how to read. He stares at his goats. He shouts "What are you doing!". Goat don't answer. His wife comes out. She says "dinner ready." Vlad ask "What is dinner?" Wife say "Beans is dinner". Vlad angry "I say you all time! I hate beans." Wife say "Kill goat, get meat." Wife go home in. Vlad is thinking, you can tell as he is scratching his stomak. After ten minutes he takes a steel pipe. He go to goat. Goat sees pipe and say "Please, dear sir, don't kill me" Vlad say "I want your meat". He is ready to make a fatal blow to goat. Suddenly earth opens. Comes out Jesus, look like Mel Gibson. He say "You shall not kill" Vlad is sorry. He lets his goat go away. Ten days later Vlad dies from grastritis.

End of stories.

Awrang Farhang

Hello, my name is Edgar. I wanted to take this opportunity to tell a little about myself. My English is not good, but I think that you will understand me. If not, then with my fist, I will beat up your face. No, it's a joke.
I have 20 years. People say that I look older, maybe 30 years. I live in Riga, a city in Europe which is known for its prostitution and poverty. This is not a joke, it may seem that this is a joke, but it's not a joke.
I am 196cm tall and weigh 103kg. This is normal. Tell me whether this is normal?
I like to practice judo. Last summer I went to summer camp and I do judo. Yet we went swimming in the evenings, when giving up judo. My father says that judo is a manly sport. My coach says that judo is more important than life, and all non-judo is manure.
I also like to be with friends. My friends are all from the judo camp. Ever, we drank beer and lying on the ground and talking about judo.
I am looking for a girlfriend, preferably an adult who interested in judo and a long relationship. She should be long, nimble and ready to do everything. No joke.
I hope in the future to find a lot of friends. Please write me.
See you later.

God.

Today I go down the road. I see squirrel falling from tree, THE squirrel dead. Went fucking emotional. Now I believe in god.

Franco.

Toaster stuff.

Bought THE toaster today. Shit doesn't work. Very unhappy. I will try to attract men now.

Michael.

Fishing.

Went fishing today. Didn't catch shit. Came home feed my goat. Happy. End of story.

Jorge

Fashion.

This gorgeous young lady came in my dreams. She blinded me with her fashionable outfit. Black color is definitely color of March and this lady knows it, too damn well.

Sweet stuff.

Goat stuff!

I find this extremely useful!
Enjoy!

Welcome.

A real mans handshake! I put my hand in your hand like a dead fish and say to you, right in the eye - “Privet!”. I welcome you my friend in my very own shelter. I want you to enjoy your time here, I want you to be very happy. First I tell about me, my family and my shelter. Follow me!

This is me:

Hello! This is me in this picture. My name is Awrang Farhang.I come from Tajikistan. I'm twenty five years old. My profession is goat farming. I eat a lot of fish and corn, on very daily basis. I am a very nice guy. I speak both russian,tajik, german and english. I am also very single, you are free to send me offers.

My Family:

This is my family. Very nice family. Everyone is doctor and goat farming. They follow American dream. I am not in this picture.

My shelter & My dream:

I want to make world better. I want peace in world, and all people love each other. I wish to be a writer, because I enjoy reading books and writing e-mails. My dream is to become the best writer in Tajikistan and go live in Slovenia.

Hello!